Saturday, October 14, 2006

God Ideas

Lately, I know I've been caught up in my own little tornado, or maybe I'm in the flying house that has been plucked up by the tornado, or MAYBE... no, never mind, I haven't seen any muchkins around, so, anyway, I'm climbing out out that funk. Because, I have come to realize that the "funk" I was in was by my own doings.

As I found my way out of the fog, a lot of things have started to occur to me. For instance, there are my ideas and then, there are God ideas! Ha! Wow! What a revelation! Give the woman a trophy, or at least a big piece of dark chocolate.

Seriously, as I waded my way out of my "funk" I was reminded of the many things that I have been blessed with that had absolutely NOTHING to do with me! See, when I get involved, things get, for lack of a better word at the moment, "funky." When I birth ideas, or even situations that God is no where in the vicinty of, boy oh boy, am I in for a ride!

Why is it though, when we (I) come up with hair brained solutions, or ideas, or plans, in my head they are fool proof and if anything should go wrong, it's the devil, or some lurking Jezebel... because of course, MY deal is the key! However, when something that may seem like a wrench gets thrown in our life, ministry, family, etc... good, bad or indifferent, we fail to look for, much less. even see God in the situation at ALL! How could God possibly speak or move through being laid off, or financial trouble, or difficulty in relationships? Well, the truth is, He can and He does, despite our own constant resistance.

When going through a difficult time, I have often times asked myself, "Where did I go wrong?" I second guess myself all over the place instead of "letting go and letting God." I know that sounds cliche-ish and maybe it is, but it is also THAT simple.

Last July (2005), I realized that I had been feeling badly for about a week or two. I was exhausted and could barely keep my head up. My two oldest daughters were scheduled to visit my parents (their grandfolks) and had to catch a plane from B'ham airport, about 45 minutes from my home. On the way home from the airport, the thought that the only tine I'd ever felt so bad was when I'd been pregnant hit me. I shrugged it off. I'd had procedures that would prevent just that almost four years earlier. Well, my "hunch" was right, and after ruling out a tubal pregnancy, we were awarded with the news that we did indeed have a viable pregnancy 8-9 weeks in. I was incredibly sick for several weeks and was diagnosed with hyperemesis which was controlled by medication. With this came many changes in my life, one of them being that I would no longer work my 12 hour a day job, instead, I started working in ministry fulltime.

Although the situation may not have played out as I would have orchestrated it, still God had His own interpretation of how my destiny would play out. In February prior to my becoming pregnant, my spiritual mother prophesied to me at a conference that I would soon be in ministry full time and would be able to leave the secular job that I was in. Of sourse that is what I wanted, but how it came to be... ah, clearly God's plan!

Still, I was able to go into full time ministry and have been blessed with the sweetest little bundle of joy, Isabella Aidan "Izzie". She has brought tremendous joy to our lives and we are so thrilled with our little miracle!

I guess I've said all this to set up for some of what I'm going to be "bloggin' " about in the next day or so.... so strap yourself in, and get ready ! tThe next time God speaks something to you, just brace yourself !

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